Eyes Open, Ears Listening
As you probably know, mental health challenges can lead to devastating side effects in one’s life, including job loss, relationship break-ups, financial troubles, physical health problems, and more. These side effects typically only occur if the mental health challenge remains unaddressed and has been allowed to worsen over time.
That’s why early intervention is so important. If we can help those we care about avoid the complications that these side effects can cause, we can help them keep their lives in balance.
All of us have mental health. Mental health, like physical health, exists on a spectrum, from healthy to stressed to struggling to a full-on crisis. If you can intervene when we notice the early signs of stress or struggle, you can literally save your loved one’s life.
So, keep your eyes open and, perhaps more importantly, keep your ears tuned for changes in the way others act, speak, and feel. There are plenty of clues that someone is stressed, but we Americans have come to accept this as an almost everyday state of being. I would instead encourage you to raise the topic and help your loved one share what’s going on with them.
You might notice the early signs of an incipient mental health challenge in the way a person appears: they may look tired or they may not be as well put-together as usual. You might start noticing that they are increasingly late (especially if they were usually on time) or are canceling social or work engagements. They might be physically present, but “checked out,” drowning in worries or thoughts about their future.
You might notice them looking sad or no longer enjoying the things that used to give them pleasure. Is the gourmet cook in your family finding it hard to shop or even cook something as simple as a microwave meal? Are they eating like they used to? Are they sleeping like they used to? Are they sleeping a lot? Are they not sleeping at all?
Some people might start having real trouble concentrating on work or school. Some may start seeming forgetful. Or they might be increasingly indecisive.
All of these are early signs of a potential mental health challenge.
I encourage you to start the conversation by saying what you’ve seen and what you’ve heard. Let the other person know you care about them. You can’t force them into conversation, but I encourage you to be persistent. If today’s not the day to talk about this stuff, make a date to have coffee tomorrow or next week. But don’t just let the matter drop.
For further advice on how to have these kinds of conversations and how to refer your loved ones to professional help, please consider joining us for any of our upcoming trainings.
Steve Benner is a Mental Health Awareness Trainer at the Center for Human Services in Bloomington, Illinois. Trainings include QPR Suicide Prevention Training, Mental Health First Aid for adults and for adults who work with youth, and the Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP). Go to mcchs.org and click on Services for more details on upcoming trainings.
Published in the August issue of Healthy Cells-Bloomington/Normal.